Feedback from our 2-day Person-Centred Encounter Group in October

Jonathan

Warm thanks to the organisers, who arranged a great venue for us - clean and comfortable, with friendly staff, and serving copious portions of tasty, fresh food. The garden provided a space to grab some fresh air and dissipate the intensity of the sessions. A setting with some nice short walks nearby would have been absolute perfection, but the Conforti Centre was great. And keeping the weekend affordable for the biggest number of people seems like the right priority. 

Once we were installed, the rest was down to the group, whose engagement, openness and candour made this a more exhilarating, challenging, moving and revealing experience than I'd dared to hope for. The group also offered abundant empathy, patience and prizing, which both balanced the more robust exchanges and, I think, enabled them. 

For me personally, the weekend brought to the surface some familiar old emotional needs and associated patterns of relating. Some of these I'm happy to own; others I might wish had been tempered by empathy and self-awareness. In any case, it was very instructive to experience them all so vividly and to have the group witness them and reflect them back. 

I can't imagine the group would have been quite such a rich experience if it had been confined to a one-day encounter. The extra time made a difference, though of course it's never enough...

Anonymous

The venue had plenty of space, was clean, staff were friendly and helpful. The food was tasty. The outside space was good for fresh air between group time. Unfortunately not enough accessible bedrooms. The weekend was well organised by Barbara and Joanne and the venue staff.

I think the venue, staff and organisation of the event enabled us to settle into a vibrant group experience. Many thanks.

Matthew

What is an encounter group? I still don’t fully know, and from the utterings of other attendees they don’t seem to know either! 

Some believe it to be the purview of “therapists” and that the space is to be held by them. Others believe that it is open to anyone in true person centred fashion. There are those who seek to impose their authority as qualified persons, those who seek to impose their particular peculiar political perversions, those who seek to hide behind the “therapeutic process”, those who try to negotiate the behaviour of others to fit what they find “acceptable”, and the rarest breed of all, the honest. 

But don’t you dare have fun! 

I was informed that the group isn’t for that! Which raises the question in me, why can’t learning and development be fun? It can be freed from the structures of self imposed authority and “expertise”. And it is fun to engage on “multiple levels” with people, be challenged and challenge them. You are well within your rights to do so at any of these events, how could it be honest otherwise? 

It is where the honesty lives that the groups come alive. This is where the real work is done. Where people lay themselves bare in a group of keen intellects, and say, what have you got for me? Do you have honesty? Or can you offer me the same old pish as everyone else? Where is the reality here? Are you listening to my life, or are you listening to yours? 

Are you “socialising” me? And what manner is that taking? Are you hoping that I revert to the “mean” of this group? If I were there, would that be the aim of the group or the actualising process? And from whom did you decide that you had that authority? 

All thinking is subject to influence, because you believe yourself to be there does not mean that your mind is in a better “order” than mine. Can I stand up to the constant social pressure exuded in order to be true to who I want to be, rather than what the group believes is best for me? 

Which one is actualisation? Your idea of it, or mine? 

Themes of grief, of power, of acceptability, of implicit and explicit contracts, of gender of everything is on offer. 

How brave are you? How sure are you? Can you open the door? 

As often is the case with encounter groups, questions are raised for you, and for others. This creates a hunger for more, and I await in anticipation for the next round. 

Sheila

Risk taking has gifted me with much insight despite feeling shit at some point .Call it ' boat-rocking'.?! I have not capsized yet. A  'life-workout' to be digested. Thanks to everyone in the group & staff at Conforti.

Anonymous

I am happy to let you know that the Encounter went very well for me. Thank you for organising and making me welcome. The venue was very comfortable in all respects and I valued the full range of experiencing, in the group and the social environment.  I look forward to the next meeting.